Can I have a thousand years with you?
by KanekiKen20
Summary: Levi thinking on how things could have been and what he would of done if Petra were still alive


_ Can I have a thousand years with you?_

_Heart, beats fast_

_Colors and promises. . ._

_ She was a ray of sun, she was the flowers that grew wildly outside the walls, she was my hope. The vision I had when all this hell was over. She was my future. My best friend. She understood me without me having to say a word. She was always watching my every move, with that beautiful smile on her face. I have always loved her, but I never acted on it. She was my comrade along with the others. I never acted on my feelings and now it's too late._

_How to be brave?_

_How can I love, when I'm afraid to fall?_

_ I will always remember her gentle voice, she was sweet and caring. I would always watch her when she was around Eren. Though I knew it was just her being nice, I was always jealous when they were together. The way she laughed, the way she got secretly excited when I came into view. Even though I knew of her feelings, she also never acted on them. It was as if she was afraid she would be rejected. I smile fondly to myself. She should have known me better. I wouldn't have rejected her. I never would._

_But watching you stand alone_

_All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow_

_One step closer. . . _

_ If only I had more time, I could have done things differently. I would have taken advantage of the time that I had with her. I would have been able to tell her my feelings. We could have changed our destiny, and make living in this world actually mean something. We could have been happy, we could have gone forward and forgotten the horror's that the titans have left behind. But it couldn't be, the titans continue to take things from me. Friends, comrades, Petra._

_I have died every day, waiting for you_

_Darling don't be afraid_

_I have loved you for a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

_ I can never get that image erased from my mind, even if I wanted to. As I glided through the trees and saw all of you, gone from this world without regard of your humanity, killed like animals. I felt as though I failed you all as your Captain. Especially you my angel. I couldn't save you, perhaps if I was there. . . you would still be here with me. You and I would be together and happy. I wanted you to know how much I loved you. How much I would always love you._

_Time, stands still_

_Beauty in all she is_

_I will be brave, I will not anything take away_

_What's standing in front of me_

_Every breath. ._

_Every hour has come to this_

_One step closer. . ._

_ I couldn't look your father in the face that day. When we came back from the expedition, and he told me about how much you talked about me to him, about how much you loved me, and how he believed you were too young to marry in his eyes. My heart ached, my hands shook, I couldn't tell him that you were never coming home. That we had to leave your body behind. My mind was elsewhere, it was no longer in the present, I was pulled back into the past._

_I have died every day waiting for you_

_Darling don't be afraid, I have loved you_

_For a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

_ Every day I will remember your smile, your laugh, your kind eyes. I will wonder how it would have felt to hold you tightly in my arms, to feel your heart beat against mine in a rhythm only known to us. What it would have been like to feel your lips against mine. To finally have made you my wife, and have our children surround us as we continued blissfully in our forever. Why has life been so unfair? Why did fate take you away in the cruelest way imaginable?_

_And all along I believed I would find you_

_Time has brought your heart to me_

_I have loved you for a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

_One step closer. . ._

_ One day I will see you again, and I will be able to tell you all the things that were left unsaid. I will give you the opportunity to tell me your feelings, and assure you that you shouldn't be afraid. That I will accept your feelings wholeheartedly and I will never reject your love, I would embrace it. After all is said and done, I will tease you a bit about how open you were about your feelings to all except me. Or perhaps I was the one who was oblivious?_

_I have died every day waiting for you_

_Darling don't be afraid, I have loved you_

_For a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

_ It doesn't matter anymore, because when we meet again, everything will be at peace. We won't have to worry about the titans, or death. All will be right and the only thing that will matter will be us. I long for that day, I continue to fight every day for my fallen comrades, for you. Have I made you proud of me Petra? There are times when I can feel your smile on me on sunny days, after it rains and reveals a rainbow, in the flowers outside the walls. I feel you all around me Petra and my heart becomes overjoyed._

_And all along I believed that I would find you_

_Time has brought your heart to me_

_I loved you for a thousand years_

_I'll love you for a thousand more_

_ I long to hear and see you again. So until then Petra, is it okay?_

_ Can I have a thousand years with you?_


End file.
